Suzanne Portnoy

This afternoon I happened to meander over to Girl with a One Track Mind who had written about a date that had gone sour after she refused to let the guy cum on her face, despite telling him in the pub hours earlier that it was one thing she really didn’t like. Yet he still tried it on until she had to threaten violence. He backed off, cumming on her chest instead. Frankly, it sounded like she got off lucky and I wondered why she had taken him back to her place at all.

The post reminded me of a similar situation I’d gotten into a few months back that never even progressed to sex. I had posted an ad on Craigslist and a guy had answered. He sent me his picture and he was in some kind of nautical gear on a sailing boat. He looked handsome with his dark hair wet from the spray, high cheekbones and full lips. I contacted him and very quickly the conversation turned to sex. Well, I’d advertised in Casual Encounters so that wasn’t untypical. I could tell immediately that he was really getting off talking dirty to me asking me whether I’d ever had anal, a threesome, lesbian sex. Then he said, ‘Would you go over to my friend’s place and fuck him and then come over and fuck me.’

Kind of homoerotic, I thought, but the fact was that I hadn’t met this guy and I hadn’t met his friend either.

‘What?’ I said. ‘You want me to go over to a complete stranger’s house and suck him off and then come over to you? Are you nuts?’

‘Why?’ he said. ‘You chicken?’

‘Not chicken,’ I said. ‘But I’m not stupid either. A woman would have to be a complete and total idiot to go inside the home of a man she had never met and have sex with him. He could turn out to be a rapist or a murderer. I’m not paranoid but your suggestion is just dumb.’

‘Oh well,’ he said. ‘I guess you won’t be meeting me then.’

‘No,’ I said. ‘That’s absolutely right. I have certain rules, the first of which is that I don’t do anything that might put me in a compromising position and that I always meet first dates in a public place.’

‘Oh well,’ he repeated again. ‘Too bad. Let me know if you change your mind.’

I get off on dirty talk as much as other women but when my fantasy just doesn’t connect with someone else’s, I know there isn’t much point in taking things further. I’ll do most things but only when I know and trust the other person. Guys that rant on about their ultimate fantasies when we haven’t even gotten to first base get short shrift from me. I hope Abby’s guy learned his lesson and won’t be trying it on with other women who feel the same way about facials, but sadly probably not.