Suzanne Portnoy

In my opinion it’s easy to understand why men seem to you more easy to keep. First because they either want to sleep with you or, they are only your friends and there is not competition.
The ones that want to sleep with you stick around because…well, it’s easy to have sex, the friends stick around because they are friends.
Men tend to be a bit more loyal to their mates. My sister had some female friends ( a bit too liberal I must add) and more than one betrayed her sleeping with a boyfriend (and they were suppose to be “close” friends). Now days she will not trust in most female friends that are too “liberal”. I had some friends of my ex that made a move at me while we were dating, and one of them was her best friend.

i love you

John - I guess that’s generally true, about men being loyal. I had friends who thought I might try and make a move on their bf. You might be surprised to learn that this has never been my thing. I like to see my friends happy. I think there’s more than enough men and women in the world for everyone; I don’t need or want to steal someone else’s boyfriend. What I like about my new girlfriends is that, although they’re all gorgeous and sexy and wonderful, they also seem grown-up. I feel like they’ve all finally left the catfighting and the bitching and competitive bullshit that goes on in the junior school playground behind them.

Here’s to more laughs..

Fair enough, and good on you that you are not the type that sleep with friend’s bf. I have a question though, have these new girlfriends got a boyfriend or only casual sex partners (NSA)?
That is a important point, because if they do not have boyfriends at the moment, they will be these “gorwn-up” friends, the moment they get a boyfriend that may change and they might see you as a threat.

Some have boyfriends, some casual sex partners. I like to think that it wouldn’t matter either way. My girlfriends agree that by one’s 40s it’s just about having people around who like you with or without a partner.

I think it matters, I have been stabbed in the back (more than once) by so called “friends”. I am 41, attractive and very, very confident, however, I would not like certain kind of women next to my man. I indeed have learned my lesson (the hard way).
I have come to realise that unless they are very close friends (really close friends) most women would stab you in the back without having a second thought, I also have realised that true friends you can count in one hand (in your entire life)…

How bizarre, Valerie. I had assumed from your previous comments about Fever parties that we were at least a generation apart! It just goes to show you can’t judge a book by its cover. Similarly, I have been typecast as the boyfriend stealer when that couldn’t be farther from the truth. As for worrying about any of my boyfriends going off with someone else (back in the day when I had a partner), frankly if a guy wants to do that, he will. It really has nothing to do with a certain type of woman. It has to do with opportunity and availability. I’d really love women to move on from putting each other down. It’s draining and boring and is the one thing stopping us from taking over the world!

My point was about what we sometimes call “friends.” Of course if my man want to go off with someone (my friend or not) he will, that is something we cannot stop. I am a loyal person and a friend for me has to be loyal, a man will come and go, a true friend will stay forever. For me my friends bf/husbands, are as good as a woman . Unfortunately there are a lot of people out there that are not like that, true friends are rare to find, regardless if a problem comes between them is about, men, money, etc.
We are not that far in age I suppose, I frequent the Fever parties because I do look 10 years younger, that is the secret Suzanne.

Yes, that’s true. Good friends are hard to find - whether you’re 16 or 60. I always tell my kids that as long as they have a couple of friends, they’re fine. As for looking our age, I’m with you on that one. I’ve always been told I look much younger than I actually am. Unfortunately, one of the more bizarre aspects of my life is that because I’ve always been photographed in disguise, everyone assumes I really do look like a Turkish transvestite!

It’s true that good friends are hard to find and keep, like any relationship. But i find that my girlfriends and I have the most fun on a girls’ night out.

I think one of the benefits of getting older is that you discover a better sense of self-esteem that allows you to weed out those friends who don’t make you feel good about yourself and feed off your energy whilst giving very little in return. You also realise that it isnt the end of the world if you’re not popular with everyone